Sunday 6 March 2011

Sunday Reality

It's time to cheer myself up a bit. I've promised myself not to have any Sunday anxiousity anymore so what's wrong with me now? Actually, Sundays should be celebrated and hey it's a day off.
Im not even motivated to study today..I don't care. My brain's just not taking in what I read. Feeling like im in some kind of Zombie coma and can't control my visions.
 I hardly slept last night so I feel like im in a bad-kind-of-hang-over-get-me-out-of-here-situation.
The killin' feeling of waking up tearly in morning and realise that I cant sleep any longer in my prince arms is rippin my heart into pieces, everytime! Knowing it's time to leave and spend days home alone again, knowing he's there alone and Im here makes me just not feel good at all and it's a strange feeling!! Though I had a lovely wkd I smile when I think of it. I'll live on these days until we meet again.
I've already had tears in my eyes twice, I've had a warm shower twice beacuse I was cold. I've been shampooing my hair with the products Des gave me *heart*. I've had alittle beauty hour with facial masks, cleansing and my creams. Picked up 2 chocolate balls from the station (and had the time to realise how pale and ghost-like i am in my Nick Carter hair and shabby clothes with wholly socks). Oh that made me feel even worse. I've been stuffing myself with food and now I feel sick and it's already the end of this Sunday. How fantastic.
Oh well, after giving you a little darn negative, sad, not in the mood, lovesick-missing side of Johanna today, I'll try lifting my chin up and control myself. Shake of and outpush the negative vibes. Promise.

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